Paving the Way

Big brothers modeling activities for little brothers.

First off, let me tell you that there is no Southern Bros. Asphalt Paving Company. And, neither is there a Southern Bros. Modeling Agency. So, if you feel that I’ve summoned you here under false pretenses, I’m sorry. No, the truth is much less interesting: this column is intended to highlight the influence that big brothers have upon the plans and interests of little brothers.

I believe I am uniquely positioned to examine this dynamic for you, inasmuch as I am both a big brother and a little brother. I am a big brother to Jim and Kathy, and a little brother to Dave.

Firstborn children have the opportunity, and the responsibility of being the first in the sibling cohort to try new things - it’s right there in the first word contained in this sentence. As a middle child, I believe I have been more active in my role as the little brother than as the big brother - sorry, Jim and Kathy.

Let’s review the instances in which Dave paved the way (or, modeled activities, if you prefer) for me.

During our time growing up in Kenilworth, Illinois, nestled along Chicago’s North Shore, Dave participated in the Kenilworth Baseball League and played for the Kenilworth Rebels, led by head coach John Dorrer. Sure, I followed in his footsteps, but those actions hardly deserve credit, because 98% of young male Kenilworth residents were active in those two endeavors. Sorry, Kathy, no coed sports opportunities back then. Now, Dave was a pretty good catcher, as was my younger brother, Jim; I tried, but couldn’t do it - I flinched when the pitch came towards the plate. I pitched a little bit, and also played some third base; managers always put the fat kid at third base.

Dave also blazed a political trail at Joseph Sears School, in Kenilworth, running for student council president. I don’t recall if he won the office; I do know that I did not, a result for which I pinned the blame on Terry Brennan’s pachysandra. . .

My younger brother, Jim, also ran for this office, and I think he won the election. This might be one instance in which I can claim the “big brother paving/modeling” credit: the name of my political party was “Suds,” derived from a childhood nickname; Jim’s party name was the derivative “Uncle Suds” (“Uncle Suds Wants You!”).

Joseph Sears School also spawned our musical performance tracks. Dave kicked things off by picking up the trombone; I followed a few years later with the clarinet and the tenor saxophone. Jim half-heartedly played the baritone horn for a few years, and Kathy may have spent time with the flute, briefly. Of the four of us, Dave and I are the only ones who still have our horns, and dust them off to play, on occasion - Dave, more frequently than I - he actively performs in some bands in the Chicago area, whereas I only play to amuse my grandchildren.

Then it was on to New Trier East, in adjacent Winnetka, Illinois. Dave played football, but invested more time and energy in music activities, including jazz bands, concert bands, orchestras and pit orchestras for musical theatre.

Little brother Bill, in contrast, played football, but invested more time and energy in music activities, including jazz bands, concert bands, orchestras and pit orchestras for musical theatre. You sense a theme here?

Dave also conducted the pit orchestra for the student-run musical, Lagniappe, and then ascended to become a co-producer of the show during his senior year. Do I even need to tell you the roles I filled regarding Lagniappe? Curiously, even though he had abandoned music performance by this time at New Trier East, business-minded Jim became a co-producer of Lagniappe, and likely was the most effective of the three of us in that role. In order that my sister, Kathy, doesn’t feel ignored, I will point with pride to her performances on stage during her time at New Trier East.

I did not pick up the thread of performing in a popular rock band in high school, as Dave did, with Dobbroe. What can I say? Sometimes even little brothers go their own way.

The next stop for Dave on his journey was Lawrence, Kansas, where he attended the University of Kansas (KU), and earned a B.S. degree in accounting. My path at KU aligned with Dave’s, although he was a member of the fraternity Phi Gamma Delta and I was a member of Tau Kappa Epsilon, a rare instance of misalignment.

At KU, Dave and I both continued our musical experience, performing as members of the KU Marching Jayhawks and conducting the pit orchestra for Rock Chalk Revue (I guess the title “Lagniappe” was already taken), my stint in each a few years after Dave.

The first step in Dave’s professional career was as an auditor with Arthur Young, in Chicago. Although I’ve never worked as an auditor, I have forged a long career as an accountant. Dave, however, stepped away from the exciting world of accounting to work as a marketer, initially with advertising agencies, and later with law firms. What the hell, man? I never got the “pivot” memo, allowing me to escape the accounting field.

Another experience Dave and I share was that we both married women whose first names begin with the letter “C,” and who grew up in Chicago’s North Shore community.

Have I never achieved anything on my own, without Dave’s guidance, you ask? Well, as far as I know, Dave has never published a (potentially) award-winning weekly column, and related podcast. And, I delight in visiting my six grandchildren; Dave and his wife, whose first name begins with “C,” as you recall, are still awaiting their first grandchild. You’re welcome to borrow mine anytime you like, Dave.

I look forward to the next phase in our mirrored journey, which may or may not include founding the Southern Bros. Asphalt Paving Company and the Southern Bros. Modeling Agency.

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