Water, Water, Everywhere. . .
If this column were a category on Jeopardy, Alex Trebek would have amplified it as, "Things that pertain to water."
Admit it, you thought the phrase was, “Water, water, every where, but not a drop to drink.” I know I did, until the Rule of Three research team explored more fully the 1834 poem by Samuel Taylor Coleridge, entitled, “The Rime of the Ancient Mariner,” and discovered the text reflected in the graphic above.
Alright, to our twenty-first century sensibilities, the actual phrase doesn’t make much sense, but, no doubt there were other things in the 19th century which we would find strange: (ironically enough) hydrotherapy; corsets (ouch!); and how the word rhyme is spelled (see above title of Coleridge’s poem, although Coleridge could also have been deploying the primary definition of the word, rime, as explained at merriam-webster.com: “an accumulation of granular ice tufts on the windward sides of exposed objects that is formed from supercooled fog or cloud and built out directly against the wind.”) - oh, Coleridge, you inscrutable bastard!
This quite lengthy poem also includes such archaic words as: “eftsoons,” which apparently meant “soon after” (I don’t know about you, but I plan to start using “eftsoons” in everyday conversations, just for the fun of it - “I’ll be at the game as well, and will plan to meet you at the bar eftsoons.” “Wait, what? The name of the bar is “Eftsoons?” “No, of course not, I simply plan to meet you eftsoons.” You can see what fun one can have with this long-retired word, assuming, of course, that your friends are kind and understanding (and, unarmed), and that you are easily-amused); “water-sprite” (a sprite believed to inhabit or haunt water); and “gramercy” (used to express gratitude or surprise).
But enough about that - this column is not about poetry, it’s about water. If you want to learn about poetry, there can be no better source than a Rule of Three column published on that subject, in July - here is the link. . .
Did you know that fully 71% of the earth is covered in water, and that oceans contain 96.5% of that water? That’s right, lakes, rivers, icecaps, and other sources account for only 3.5% of water on earth. The Great Lakes and the mighty Mississippi. . .not so great and mighty after all, eh?
While we’re talking about water, on average, 60% of the human body is water, and that percentage can range up to 75%.
And, finally, roughly 60% of Scotch whisky is water.
So you see, water is a very important element in our lives - you might even agree with me that it is truly existential.
Which is why we here at Rule of Three intend to plumb the depths (wink, wink) of this meaningful topic in ways that other scholarly studies have not; a sidebar benefit will be that you will be fully prepared to take on the category of water, should you appear on Jeopardy, and have the further good fortune to appear on an episode which features a category pertaining to all things water.
Some memorable musical compositions have featured the topic of water, including: Bridge over Troubled Water (Simon & Garfunkel); Smoke on the Water (Deep Purple); Raindrops Keep Falling on my Head (B.J. Thomas); Purple Rain (Prince); Moon River (Audrey Hepburn); Singin’ in the Rain (Arthur Freed); Splish Splash (Bobby Darin); and Surfin’ Safari (Beach Boys).
And, what about movies? Some movies that immediately spring to mind include: Titanic; The Poseidon Adventure; Finding Nemo, The Perfect Storm; The Little Mermaid; Cast Away; Free Willy; Jaws (you’re hearing that music right now, aren’t you? Click on “Jaws Theme” here to actually hear it). . .Jaws Theme; and Splash.
On the literary front, titles that surface include: The Old Man and the Sea (Hemingway); Moby Dick (Melville); The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (Twain); Water for Elephants (Gruen); Heart of Darkness (Conrad); and not one, but two classic children’s books by Dr. Seuss: A Fish out of Water, and One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish.
And, who can forget Monet’s Water Lilies series of paintings? One of my personal favorite paintings is Gustave Caillebotte’s Paris Street, Rainy Day, which hangs in Chicago’s Art Institute. . .
The Art Institute also houses Georges Seurat’s A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grand Jatte, which prominently features water (and a monkey, but I’ll save that for a future column on monkeys). . .
Another avenue ripe for exploration is memorable lines in movies and TV shows regarding water. Predictably, this list is led by Bill Murray’s scene in Caddyshack with the priest. . .
Oh, who am I kidding - that’s all I got in this category.
So, even though Alex Trebek is no longer with us, and no longer hosting Jeopardy, Rule of Three is quite pleased to have played a role in equipping you to effectively compete on Jeopardy, as long as “Things that pertain to water” is one of the categories. Just remember to respond in the form of a question - ex.: Jeopardy Host: “This award-winning, weekly column is beloved by millions around the world.”
You: “What is Rule of Three, Jeopardy Host?”
Jeopardy Host: “That is correct, Jeopardy Contestant.”
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Bill,
I look forward to the column on monkeys, eftsoons .
Marry Christmas