Who Do You Look Like?

An epic doppelganger battle looms.

Each snowflake is unique. I’m not talking about the derogatory term which has been widely overused during the last several years, decrying hypersensitivity amongst millennials and liberals; rather, I’m talking about the stuff that falls from the sky. The prevailing wisdom is that each snowflake is unique - no two are exactly alike. I would argue that, in order to prove that theorem, one would need access to an incredibly powerful microscope, which could zoom-in on each snowflake being tested, and, further, that the testing occur in a really cold environment, because, you know, snow melts when it’s not cold enough. As for the other type of snowflake (the derogatory term which has been widely overused during the last several years, decrying hypersensitivity amongst millennials and liberals), I have no idea. I mean, they all look alike to me, but so do skinheads, and Mormons, and square-dancers, so don’t go by me.

Just as with snowflakes, it is believed that each human being is unique - setting aside the anomaly of identical twins. But, perhaps, as I have, you have heard from others that, “Oh my God, you look exactly like __________!” (insert the name of a celebrity in the blank space).

I’ll go first. When I was younger, on more than one occasion, someone suggested that I resembled Jeff Bridges. In fact, a ticket agent at the airport in Kansas City insisted that I was Jeff Bridges, and was quite excited that she had the opportunity to meet me, I mean him; I very clearly indicated that I was not Jeff Bridges, had never been Jeff Bridges, and had never even seen the TV show, Sea Hunt, which starred his father, Lloyd Bridges, and which provided young Jeff with some of his earliest acting credits (I discount his role as “Infant at Train Station” in a 1951 film entitled, The Company She Keeps, flagged as Bridges’ first acting credit, because he probably doesn’t remember performing in that film). This Jeff Bridges connection didn’t disturb me, because, back then, he had acted respectably in a handful of movies, and television series, the most well-known being King Kong, in 1976, and, besides, he wasn’t a bad-looking guy.

According to IMDB.com, Bridges has gone on to log ninety-three acting credits over the years, including recognizable hits such as: Tucker: The Man and His Dream; Seabiscuit; and Iron Man. More importantly, I don’t believe he’s become ensnared in significant controversies, which have derailed other Hollywood types, such as sexual harassment, college admissions fraud, or conservatorship issues. So, I’m still cool with my “relationship” with Jeff Bridges. By the way, I wonder if anyone has ever said to him, “Hey, you look exactly like __________!” (insert the name of an award-winning columnist in the blank space).

Some years after my encounter with the Kansas City ticket agent, but, still many years ago, I attended a business conference in Minneapolis. And, at a party in conjunction with the conference, a woman said to me, “Hey, you know who you look like?”

I knew exactly what was coming, but smugly responded, “No, who’s that?”

“John Goodman - you’re a dead-ringer,” she answered, rather definitively.

Wait, what? The guy from Roseanne? Now, don’t get me wrong, John Goodman is a fine actor, and has amassed awards and plenty of recognition during his acting career. IMDB.com credits him with one hundred sixty-six roles over the years (that’s nearly twice as many as Jeff Bridges, for those of you keeping score at home), including The Babe; The Flintstones; and Monsters, Inc. And, yes, I think he’s emerged scandal-free, as has Jeff Bridges, and, likely a few other Hollywood types as well (not many, but at least a few).

But, can I be honest with you here? I wasn’t thrilled with the suggestion that I look like John Goodman, because, well, he’s probably not on anyone’s short list of handsome, leading men. Alright, he’s oversized, and not generally considered to be classically-handsome - there, I said it. I’m sorry I had to be so frank with you - I tried not to sugarcoat it.

Now, even though I’ve been aware of the 1998 Coen brothers film entitled, The Big Lebowski, I had never seen it. Until just recently. Don’t ask me why I decided that I needed to see this particular film now, given that no one has indicated to me that I look like either one of the two stars of that film, Jeff Bridges, or John Goodman, in over twenty years, but I determined that I should see it - kill two birds with one stone, in a way.

Thus began my quest to locate and watch (for free) a twenty-four-year-old movie, amongst the six or seven TV streaming services to which we subscribe (“Streaming Service Creep” is a naturally-occurring affliction in today’s post-cable world, as TV viewers subscribe, with the click of a button, to an additional streaming service, accompanied by an additional monthly fee, in order to watch a brand new TV show, not carried on any of their current streaming services. It is this dynamic which yields combined monthly TV-watching bills exceeding $200.00/month, and which should spawn, if it hasn’t already, service organizations named something like, “Cancelmyfriggingstreamingservicenow.com,” which have become quite common in the time-share vacation-home, wine-of-the-month club, and Scientology space), because a quick trip to the local Blockbuster store to rent a recent hit (or, a twenty-four-year-old movie), which you can watch from the comfort of your own couch, is no longer an option.

Encountering incremental fees on every platform which featured The Big Lebowski, I considered giving up. But, then I searched YouTube, seeking, “The Big Lebowski Full Movie,” and hit pay-dirt.

Now, viewing this movie, which runs one hour, fifty-seven minutes, in three-minute stretches, surrounded by the same damn commercials over and over again, is not the ideal way to see it, but, it was, inarguably, free.

I now see what all the fuss is about. The Big Lebowski is indeed a solid Coen Brothers effort, and “The Dude” character portrayed by Jeff Bridges is quite memorable. But, in my opinion, John Goodman steals the show here, with his star turn as Walter Sobchak.

So, if you want to visit (or, revisit) a classic cult film from the late 1990’s, and also get a glimpse into my two doppelgängers (a great name for a band, by the way), you can do no better than to locate The Big Lebowski on one of your many streaming platforms, fire-up the hot air popcorn popper, and settle-in for an enjoyable movie, which you can watch from the comfort of your own couch.

I suppose that I’m now more open to observations regarding which celebrity I closely resemble than I used to (thicker skin, perhaps), but I think I’d have to draw the line at Fred Gwynn (you know, Herman Munster).

So, that’s my doppelgänger story. What’s yours?

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